Star Trek: Take Refuge in What You Know 25/34

[corpus_invictus]

Title: Take Refuge in What You Know, Chapter 25
Fandom: Star Trek XI
Pairing: Spock/Kirk, hints of others
Rating: PG-13
Notes: Written for the Star Trek XI Kink Meme prompt found here: "AU - Kirk has moved into a apartment/house and wants to get to know his neighbors. He meets his neighbor Spock, a loner who suffers from extreme agoraphobia. Kirk thinks he's beautiful enigma."


Jim glanced down at Joanna climbing the stairs next to him, happily munching away at an ice cream cone. "Tell me again why you're wearing the tutu."

She rolled her eyes at him, a look so reminiscent of her father that Jim had to repress a laugh. "Because I have ballet tomorrow."

"Uh huh." He led her up the last flight of stairs, tapping the code into his security system and letting them into his apartment. "And why do you have to wear the tutu now if ballet isn't until tomorrow?"

"I gotta practice, don't I?" she returned, her tone indicating that he was a colossal idiot for not thinking of that.

"Sure," he agreed quickly, smiling at the note he had known would be on his floor. He picked it up, still questioning Joanna. "But I didn't think you could practice ballet in... are those your snow boots or your rain boots?"

Another of those long-suffering little faces. "Uncle Jim, it's not gonna snow in May. These are rain boots."

"Oh, see, I was confused because your snow boots are pink with purple hearts, whereas your rain boots are also pink with purple hearts."

She scowled at him. "Yeah, but these hearts have glitter. So they're the rain boots."

"Of course." This new, old-enough-to-dress-myself stage of Joanna's was going to earn him a smack at some point, Jim was convinced of it. But he also couldn't help questioning a little girl in a striped tank top, ballet tutu, floral leggings, and rain boots. "Well as long as you're not going to practice your dancing on the stairs, I guess what you wear is your own business."

"Hmph," was all she said in return, finishing off her ice cream cone.

Jim's attention shifted to the note in his hand for a moment, smiling at the bold elegance of the script. It had been days since he'd received anything in the jagged, shaky writing that indicated either an episode in the works or one that had passed shortly before he'd sent Jim a note. Are you free this evening?

Jim folded the paper in half and scrawled a quick response, grinning down at Joanna. "Hey, would you like to see Mister Spock again?"

She mulled that over. "Does he like tea parties?"

"He likes tea," Jim attempted to dodge the question.

"Okay!" she agreed, her voice gleeful enough for Jim to understand she didn't care about the distinction.

He tried explaining it as opened his door and let her into the hallway. "That means he doesn't like ribbons in his hair or making conversation with your stuffed bunny."

"He doesn't know he doesn't like that stuff. He hasn't tried," Joanna pointed out reasonably.

Jim decided to stop arguing the matter, handing her the note and leaning against his door frame. "Go shove that under his door. Then wait a few seconds before you knock."

"Why?"

"Because I said so."

She squinted at the words on the paper. "What's it say?"

"It says 'Special delivery.' Which means you," he clarified before she could ask. "He doesn't know I'm watching you for a little bit today so you're going to be a surprise for him."

She beamed at that, flouncing next door and doing as she was told. She clumsily stuffed the note under the seam of his door and waited a full five seconds before banging on it.

It opened fully without the cursory, suspicious inch first. Spock looked clean, immaculate - a far cry from his disheveled, wild self when his anxiety took over. His gaze was fixed straight ahead for an instant, a brief look of surprise crossing his features before he looked down. He didn't smile, but Jim could see the fondness softening his expression. "Hello, Joanna."

"Hi Mister Spock. Wanna come over for a tea party? Uncle Jim said it was okay." And she pointed at him as if to clear up any confusion regarding who she was referring to.

He gave an amused kind of shrug when Spock looked at him. "I said it was okay to invite you over for tea. Not so much the party bit."

"I didn't even bring Bunny Pants with me today," Joanna pouted from where she was planted in front of Spock's apartment. "And I don't have any ribbons, either."

Now Spock just looked baffled. "Bunny... Pants?"

Jim couldn't quite suppress his laughter. "Her stuffed rabbit. Suffers through quite a few tea parties, I think. And I told her she wasn't allowed to put ribbons in your hair. She will try if you let her."

"That was our Christmas card last year! I put lots of ribbons and stuff in Uncle Jim's hair and we took a picture. We didn't know you yet, Mister Spock, or you would have gotten one."

"Indeed?" was apparently all Spock could think to say.

Jim shook his head. "Joanna? Mister Spock can't accept the invitation if you keep talking his ears off."

She clapped both hands over her mouth and looked up at Spock with huge, pleading eyes.

"I am honored by your invitation," Spock told her, eminently formal even as he was fighting down the urge to smile at her - Jim could see it in the corners of his mouth.

"Eeee!" came the excited squeal from behind Joanna's hands, and she tore back into Jim's apartment.

"I guess she figured that was a yes." Jim took a moment to steal a kiss while Joanna wasn't looking. "She missed you. And I thought you might like to spend some time with her now that she's not in the midst of the divorce stuff."

Spock nodded, cheeks going green at being kissed in front of an audience, even if that audience hadn't been paying attention at the time. "She is much improved since I last saw her."

Jim couldn't help it. "So are you."

Before Spock could respond to that, Joanna piped up from the kitchen. "Uncle Jim? You gonna come make tea or what?"

"Man, you're bossy today," he called back, making his way to the kitchen with Spock following behind him. "Why don't you keep Mister Spock busy and I'll deal with the drinks?"

"Okay." She turned her full attention on Spock. "When it snows, can you stand on top of it without leaving footprints?"

Jim didn't fully cover his snicker under a cough as he fished out a few mismatched mugs and some tea bags.

Spock didn't look at all offended, settling himself in one of the kitchen chairs so he was closer to her level when he replied. "Vulcans have a heavier bone and muscle structure than humans do. I am, in fact, more likely to leave footprints in snow than you are."

"Oh." She crawled up on Spock's chair, her booted feet balancing on the rung and her hands on his knees for support. "Do you sing at trees?"

"Jojo? Did you ask before you invaded Mister Spock's personal space?" Jim piped up.

"I'm not invading! I'm balancing," she informed him.

Spock waved off Jim's protest. "Her dismissal of personal space is not bothersome," he assured him, then answered her question before she could ask him to translate. "There are very few trees on Vulcan. However, there are several folk songs dedicated to the deserts and the mountains. My mother was always fond of the Lullaby of Mount Seleya."

"My daddy likes the Alabama Lullaby."

"Sweet Home Alabama isn't a lullaby," Jim told her, setting a mug of hot chocolate in front of her. "And there's your tea."

Spock raised an eyebrow. "That is not-"

"It's tea," Jim interrupted him, giving him a stern look. "Tea for picky four year olds, anyway." He set another mug in front of Spock. "We're drinking the grownup kind."

Joanna wrinkled her nose at it. "That stuff smells like daddy's doctor bag."

"Which is why you get special tea and not regular tea," Jim told her, kissing the top of her head before sitting in the other chair.

"Hmph." She took a sip from her mug and then continued her interrogation of Spock. "You wanna know what my daddy calls you?"

Jim sensed danger. "Jojo-"

"He calls you a gobhoblin. Hobgoblin. Somethin' like that. They have green blood. Do you have green blood, too?"

Spock's eyebrows were up to his hairline now. Jim tried to do some damage control. "That's just how Bones operates. If he's thought up some kind of disparaging nickname for you, that means he likes you. He calls me an idiot all the time. It's a sign of affection coming from him."

"He calls me a brat!" Joanna added cheerfully. "And ibnosh... obnosh... ignoshis," she tripped over the word.

"Obnoxious," Spock corrected her.

"Yep, that one. Do you have green blood?" she asked again, trying to keep the easily distracted adults on topic.

Spock took a long sip from his mug, either trying to compose himself or trying not to freak out over all the questions and comments throwing him for a loop. "I do."

"Weird. Does blood come in other colors, too?"

"Klingon blood is a bright fuchsia color."

"What's fuchsia?"

"Somewhere between purple and pink," Jim told her when the question seemed to fluster Spock. "It's probably a little more on the pink side where Klingons are concerned. And Andorians have blue blood."

"Like all the rich nasties Daddy used to doctor on back home?"

"Er, no. That's a different kind of blue blood than-" Jim was saved from his explanation by a knock on the door.

"Daddy!" Joanna squealed, dropping her mug back on the table and making a beeline for the door.

Spock looked distinctly uncomfortable, his gaze darting from his own mug of tea, to the living room, then back again. He had been fairly composed during Joanna's rapid-fire questioning, but now he was taking on that familiar, anxious look. "I-"

Jim scooted his chair closer, wrapping his hands around Spock's on his mug, trying to project whatever level of calm he could. "That'll be Bones coming to pick her up," he said, perhaps unnecessarily considering Joanna's squealing. "You don't have to leave the kitchen if you don't want to. I can head out there and deal with him alone. But he would like to meet you, if you're okay with that."

Spock wouldn't look at him, his eyes fixed but unfocused on their hands wrapped around his mug of tea. He was silent for a long time, seeming to concentrate on something Jim couldn't perceive. "He is not here for a medical visit?" he finally asked.

Jim couldn't lie to him. "He's here to pick up his daughter. And he'd like to thank you for your help. But he's a doctor - he'll probably go a little medical on you even if he's not here for that purpose. He still wants to help you."

Spock swallowed, his fingers trembling faintly under Jim's.

"He's not here to poke or prod at you, if that was what you were asking," Jim continued. "He'll probably ask a few questions, maybe make a few suggestions, and then he'll take Joanna home. It's not a big involved medical visit, I promise. And if he starts turning it into one, I'll kick him out." He risked leaning forward to kiss his cheek, relieved when he didn't twitch away from the physical contact. "He's human," he reminded him. "He's not going to storm in and judge you based on the Vulcan point of view. He's approaching this from a human standpoint, which is that you should be able to handle your emotions without losing it all the time."

It took an age, but Spock inclined his head in the briefest of nods. "Very well."

Jim wanted to surge forward and kiss him again, marveling at the kind of courage it took for him to meet with a stranger, and a stranger with a medical background at that. But he didn't want to throw him any more off balance than he already was. Instead he stood and offered a hand to him. "I'll be there with you. And you're welcome to leave at any time if you need to freak out in the bathroom or something. No one here will mind, I promise."

Spock nodded again, fitting his hand into Jim's and allowing himself to be pulled from the chair. Surprisingly, he didn't let go of Jim even when they entered the living room, keeping a firm grip on him as if Jim were holding him together through the touch of their fingers. "Hey Bones," Jim said, going for casual and certain he was failing.

"You fed her ice cream," was the accusing response, Joanna balanced on his hip looking anything but innocent.

"What makes you think so?" Jim hedged.

"She has chocolate breath."

"That's from tea, Daddy," Joanna informed him, smacking her lips together. "The ice cream was strawberry."

"Joanna, you are the second worst secret keeper I've ever met." He tried to change the subject before McCoy went on a rant about his daughter's sugar intake. "This is Spock, by the way. Spock, this is Leonard McCoy."

Spock made no move to pull his hand away to shake McCoy's, and it took a moment before Jim remembered the recordings and how horrified the Vulcans were at the vulgar human social practice. "Jim speaks of you a great deal," Spock said, his gaze not quite meeting McCoy's.

"You're the one who sent me the Vulcan lawyer," McCoy returned, ignoring Spock's attempt at small talk. "I owe you one, big time."

Spock shook his head. "You are in no way indebted to myself. My father-"

"Has better things to do than ship off one of his attorneys to help out an old country doctor he's never met," McCoy interrupted. "I owe you one and that's final."

Jim felt a hint of anxiety creeping up his spine. He didn't mind challenging Spock during the course of a conversation, but Spock was used to him. He didn't want McCoy bullying him just to get a point across. He opened his mouth to change the subject when Spock beat him to it.

"Saying a matter is final does not automatically make it so," Spock informed him, one of his eyebrows going up to his hairline again. "You are not obligated to offer any kind of repayment."

"Bullshit."

"Daddy!" Joanna admonished him, looking scandalized.

"As if you haven't heard worse comin' out of your mother's mouth," he muttered, setting her back on the floor. "Do me a favor. Head back to Jim's room and make sure you know those ballet positions by heart. All eight of 'em. I'll call you when we're ready to go."

"There's five," she corrected, but took off toward the back of the apartment anyway.

"Teaching her some interesting vocabulary for a preschooler," Jim couldn't help needling him.

"Shut up. Joss is worse and you know it." He grabbed a small medical data PADD from his bag and shifted the conversation toward Spock. "Here's what M'Benga and I have been researching on our off-duty hours. Based on your symptoms, M'Benga thinks you should be meditating a hell of a lot more, but I hear Jim told you that already."

Spock blinked, looking thrown by the sudden abandonment of their argument. "Affirmative."

"Affirmative," McCoy grumbled to himself before continuing. "So if that doesn't work fast enough for you, there's another option. You know what mentisinil is?"

Spock squeezed Jim's hand, the first outward sign he'd shown of anxiety. "It is a compound used on Vulcans who have lost their mates due to sudden or traumatic death."

"But only used on the ones who lose control of their telepathy or their emotions as a result. Helps 'em reel themselves back in, right?"

The hand in Jim's squeezed tighter and Jim could feel the fingers shaking in his own. "I am unsure of the specifics, as medicine was not one of the focal points of my studies, but it is my understanding that ek'tevakh-ta'bek temporarily nullifies brain activity until such time as the individual has his or her mental controls and shields back in place."

McCoy tapped the PADD a few times, apparently making sure that he and Spock were talking about the same drug. "Right," he said once he had confirmed it. "We're thinking we could start playing with it, see if it helps you out. Not at full strength, obviously, since you're only half Vulcan and it's not the bond that's made your controls go all screwy. We were thinking of diluting it with some mild human tranquilizers. With your metabolism the tranquilizers won't affect you too much and they'll soften the effects of the mentisinil." He turned off the PADD, focusing on Spock instead. "The thing is, we have no way of knowing exact numbers unless we experiment with it a little. Now, I know you're not a fan of medics. But if you're up to it, I'd like to try tinkering with some dosages to see if they help. If not we'll ditch the whole idea, but I think it's worth a try."

"I..." Spock trailed off, his stoic expression gone and replaced with the dreaded fight-or-flight response wavering in his eyes. "I do not..." He looked at Jim for help, his hand squeezing Jim's hard enough to leave bruises.

"We don't have to discuss this now," Jim assured him. "It's just something to think about. We can figure it out later, if you want. Or not at all."

"You do not..." Spock tried again, directing it at McCoy this time. But he couldn't get the words out, the trembling spreading up his arm and into his shoulders. The bones in Jim's hand creaked in protest at the pressure being exerted against them.

"Bathroom's free," Jim whispered in his ear, giving him the exit he so desperately needed. "I'll get Bones and Joanna out of here and I'll be there in a few minutes."

Spock didn't look at either one of them as he pulled his hand away from Jim's and almost ran for the bathroom, shutting and locking the door behind him.

"Hell, Jim, I didn't mean to freak him out," McCoy began to apologize.

Jim waved him off. "Don't worry about it. You're a stranger to him, a medical professional on top of that, and you mentioned wanting to experiment on him. I know you didn't mean it that way," he added quickly, since McCoy had opened his mouth to argue the point. "But the word leaves a bad taste in his mouth ever since Stonn pulled his experimental bullshit on him. I'll talk to him later and see if he's open to it. If not..." He shrugged. "Well, you tried."

McCoy nodded. "I'll grab Joanna and get out of here." He scowled. "I hate that I egged him into a panic attack."

Jim threw an arm around his shoulders as a show of support. "If it makes you feel any better, you've still got several dozen to go before you're any kind of competition for the number of attacks I've caused."

"Goodie," he muttered. Then he raised his voice. "Jojo? Get on out here. We're goin' home."

She flounced back out from Jim's bedroom. "I'm all practiced out," she informed him, holding up her arms to be picked up. "Where's Mister Spock?"

"Mister Spock's not feeling too good," Jim told her, ruffling her messy hair once McCoy had her balanced on his hip again. "You'll have to visit him again sometime when he's better."

"Okay." She kissed Jim's cheek, then pushed on his face until she had kissed both of them. "Give one of those to Mister Spock," she ordered, wagging her finger at him as McCoy carried her out the door.

"Yes ma'am," Jim returned, giving her a Starfleet salute as she and McCoy made their way down the stairs.

To Chapter Twenty Six

Comments

[kuhekabir]

another excellent update! i love how spock is making progress :)

[ashleyj28.livejournal.com]

I just love that Spock's so comfortable around Joanna - she's so adorable! I hope he'll be able to get that way around others.

[thisissirius]

Brilliant yet agin!

Ugh, MCCOY MET SPOCK. i have been waiting for this chapter forEVER and i am so excited to see it layed out. eeeeeee. it went just as i imagined it would! the two of them with the beginnings of that argument (FORESHADOWING? OH, I HOPE SO) and it's just making my heart hurt with JOY at how much i want this!

♥

this chapter is amazing; i am so looking forward to the next one ;_;

[majoline]

Thank you for the update! I love your Joanna; she's such a hoot!

I hope that Spock isn't set back by McCoy - he's gruff however good natured.

[excentryke]

hurrah! two updates from my two favorite star trek fics in one day :D

I loved jojo and her tutu and rain boot (adorable, and so spot on). Looking forward to seeing what Spock decides,
cheers, cen

[twig_tea]

♥ ♥ ♥

The tea party was ADORABLE. I love how comfortable Spock is with Joanna. And Spock and Bones finally met! LOL I love that Jim's all "agh bones is strongarming must step in" and Spock's just all "I can handle this stubborn jerk with MORE stubbornness and LOGIC" XDDD ahhahah. Nice to see even in this universe they rub eachother the wrong way. Sad to see another attack, and to not get a resolution yet on that medication thing...but it makes sense that Spock totally freaked. He lasted way longer than he would have at the beginning of Jim and Spock's friendship. Or even at the beginning of Jim and Spock's relationship. It's nice to see Spock's improvement in different ways.

And as always, Joanna is just too cute! She stole the show in this one, I think.

[corpus_invictus]

Thank you - this is exactly what I was trying to show in this chapter, that Spock still isn't 'cured' but that he's much improved.

And Joanna always steals the show when she's around, which is why I try to limit her use. :)

[coeurdesoleil]

I LOVE THIS STORY SO MUCH!!

Joanna is adorable! I often find that kids seem so much more like tiny adults than as children in fics, but not in this one. I love that Joanna acts very much her age throughout this story, and she's brilliantly written as are all the characters.

Good to see that Spock is steadily making progress, even if he did panic towards the end. He has come such a long way already, and I am so happy for him.

[(Anonymous)]

Yay. Happy for the update. I thought the interaction between Spock and Joanna in this chapter was wonderful, though I was surprised by how you handled Spock meeting Bones. Or more particularly, how McCoy more or less gave Spock the 3rd degree upon first meeting. I thought that since McCoy is a doctor he would know better than to dump all of that onto Spock at once. I dunno. I just feel that it was out of character for him to do that. I know he was regretful, but still...hmm....could have been handled better. Made it not so believable to me.

Anyway, regardless, I look forward to the next chapter. I'm sorta interested in how Spock's handling his panic attacks these days, now that he's so much less frazzled than before.

[corpus_invictus]

I think I was operating with the kind of Bones who tells his patients to shut up in Sick Bay (something he does to the Captain in Journey to Babel). He's not exactly well known for his bedside manner, although I do agree that he went into a bit of an information dump here. Hopefully their future interactions will be better. :)

[laitaine]

This was wonderful, as always! I loved how Spock doesn't tense up around Joanna (who I loved and adore, by the way, she's great!), and he didn't immediately got into panic mode when Bones showed up - that's definitely progress! ♥

[(Anonymous)]

I ADORE THIS - and love that there's a new chapter today! Joanna is adorable and I love that Bones isn't taking no for an answer when it comes to helping Spock! Cannot wait for more - as usual - and also? YOU ROCK!!!!

[carmanne]

Absolutely lovely! I love Joanna, I love love Bones, and I was so excited for Spock to be moving in a better direction-- he's got a while to go, but hopefully his healing will be accelerated by Bones...?

[waketosleep]

I like how even in this universe, there's barely an exchange of names before Spock and McCoy are arguing. :D

[lickskillet]

It's intriguing that Spock is much more at-ease with Joanna being in his personal bubble than anyone else - Jim excluded, of course. This chapter was a good mix levity thanks to Joanna, but I ... not liked because of course I want him to be better, but it was good to see that Spock is making huge leaps, but he's not there yet. At least, not with everybody.

"It opened fully without the cursory, suspicious inch first. Spock looked clean, immaculate - a far cry from his disheveled, wild self when his anxiety took over."

That to me was so telling. I hadn't even thought about how that was how he opened every door, until that was mentioned.

And poor Bones; he does try his best... but I can see his personality being a bit much for Spock, especially on top of his being a medic and what he came over to talk about. I was actually like. Like I had this spike of worry for Spock when the chapter abruptly ended. You and your cliffhangers! >8[

[(Anonymous)]

Joanna is so great. Sweet without being completely annoying. I love how this fic is progressing slowly and building up on Spock's recovery, instead of being wham he's cured!

-notchka88

[perfica]

Just wanted to let you know I get excited every time you post a chapter of this story because I can't wait until it's finished so I can read it in one glorious sitting.

[(Anonymous)]

YAY! Update FTW! <3 this verse so much! thankyou for updating!!!

[cathepsut]

Update, yay! Where is my chocolate tea....?

[renuki]

Well, you tried, Bones, you tried. (at least it took while before he ran.)

*smiles at Joanna*

[cozibizzle]

I really love this story. Stil check every day for updates. Its great Spock is making progress.

x

[(Anonymous)]

i love how you kept mccoy so in character. rough but concerned. :)

[margarks]

YAY for Joanna! I love all her elf questions and Spock's calm, logical responses ;) She's so cute! They are adorable together! I like McCoy's gruff manner because that's just McCoy and it totally figures he wouldn't change anything even when he's trying to help. I don't think he knows how to anyway, which is why we love him!

And I love hand holding! YAY!

Off to read the 2nd part. :)

cVYtlLDFsmIvLmoZvqO

[(Anonymous)]

Felt so hopeless looknig for answers to my questions...until now.