Title: Take Refuge in What You Know, Chapter 21
Fandom: Star Trek XI
Pairing: Spock/Kirk, hints of others
Rating: NC-17
Notes: Written for the Star Trek XI Kink Meme prompt found here: "AU - Kirk has moved into a apartment/house and wants to get to know his neighbors. He meets his neighbor Spock, a loner who suffers from extreme agoraphobia. Kirk thinks he's beautiful enigma."
Chapter Notes: If this seems sudden and/or slightly out of character, have no fear - it will be addressed in the next chapter. In the meantime, enjoy. :)
Jim was glad McCoy wasn't around to see any of this, because he was getting mighty damn tired of the Princess Jamie comments. Something about Spock turned him into a nervous thirteen year old girl, and thank God McCoy wasn't around to witness it manifesting tonight. He'd be offering to paint Jim's nails, and Jim would be forced to punch him, and McCoy would probably retaliate with a hypospray, and it would probably make Jim's hands swell up and his eyeballs bleed, and oh my God, why was he thinking about this now?
"Are you going to throw up?" Gaila sassed him from her perch on Jim's sofa.
He made a face at her. "No."
"Because you look like you're going to throw up. That's not some human pre-sex thing, is it? Because if all the humans I've screwed around with have been throwing up before we-"
"No, I am not going to throw up, and there's no need to cast aspersions on the entire human race just because you think I look sick."
"Tch, humans are so touchy," she muttered, missing the point on purpose like she always did. "Are those your ass-hugging jeans? Turn around," she ordered, and he didn't think to disobey her. "Those are not your ass-hugging jeans. Go find the ones you were wearing when you moved in. Those looked great."
"They have holes and paint on them. That's not sexy."
"Depends where the holes are," she grinned at him. "Now go put them on. Your shirt's fine, leave that alone."
"Remind me how exactly you managed to weasel your way in here? Because I don't recall inviting you in and I sure as shit don't remember needing fashion tips from someone who wears pink dental floss to seduce women."
"Must've been memorable, seeing as that's the second time you've bitched about it. Now go change."
He debated arguing with her again, but the fact of the matter was she'd been incredibly helpful last time he had wanted to move things forward with Spock. It wouldn't hurt to listen to her again. Even so... "Am I gonna smell like your pheromones when I go over there? Because it's pointless to change if I'm gonna have to shower after you leave."
"I took a double dose of my inhibitors after lunch. He shouldn't be able to smell anything questionable on you. Unless I rub myself all over you before you head over there."
"I'll pass, thanks." He emerged from his bedroom in the 'right' pair of jeans, feeling even more like a thirteen year old girl than ever. "Does this meet inspection?"
She eyed him critically. "They're not as tight on you as I remembered."
"Gaila, I am not going to go through every pair of pants in my closet until you find one you like. Pick these or pick the other pair and then get out."
"Maybe you ought to take a shower after all. Sounds like you could use a good wank to get all the bitchiness out of your system. Being an irritant is not a turn-on, Jimmy. Unless you've got a Klingon on the side I don't know about." She glared at him suspiciously. "Is there a Klingon on the side?"
"Oh no. You've found me out. Aperokei and I are in love and you can't stop us," he deadpanned.
She threw one of the couch pillows at him. "You're adding to your bar tab every time you mock me, I'll have you know."
All of the fight went out of Jim suddenly and he sagged into his armchair. "Trust me, Gaila. If this works I will buy your drinks for the next month."
Her eyes lit up. "Really?"
"Your Cosmopolitans," he backtracked quickly. "When we're out at the Academy bars. Looks like it's time for you to go."
She snickered at him, hopping up from her seat and kissing him on the cheek. "Good luck, Jimmy."
"Thanks," he returned, watching her flounce out the door.
He waited until he heard the click of her own apartment door closing, not wanting to be watched when he finally knocked on Spock's door. He smiled when Spock's face came into view. "Hey."
"Jim," Spock returned, gesturing towards the kitchen. "We have not had an opportunity to play for 4.8 days. I believe it is your turn to play white."
Jim stopped him with a gentle hand on his wrist before he could take off towards the board. "I'll keep that in mind," he smiled in what he hoped was a winning fashion. "But I have another idea."
To his credit, Spock merely raised an eyebrow at him rather than seizing up automatically. Usually when Jim changed their routine, Spock would get anxious and stuttery on him. He must have had a good day if he was being so open to suggestion. Jim gave him a good long look and what he saw confirmed his hypothesis. The bags under Spock's eyes were gone. His glasses were clean and perched straight on his nose. His posture was perfect, but not rigid. It even looked as though he'd brushed his mass of dark hair; it still curled around his ears and along the nape of his neck, but it no longer made him look so wild. It was just long and silky, begging to be pet.
"Are you going to elucidate on this idea of yours?" Spock interrupted Jim's thoughts, eyebrow arching ever-higher over his glasses.
"Right, yeah," he shook his head to stop distracting himself. "There's something I'd like for you to see. But it would involve leaving your room."
That killed the relaxed vibe Spock had been giving off. His shoulders tensed. The expression on his face morphed from easy and open to the neutral mask Jim hated. "I see," Spock said, his voice strained.
Jim moved forward, sifting his fingers into Spock's hair soothingly. "Relax," he pleaded, kissing him softly. "It doesn't involve leaving the building, I promise. And you won't have to interact with anyone but me."
He didn't lean into the contact and didn't really return the kiss either. His gaze turned piercing. "How are you able to make that guarantee?"
"Because I've worked it out so you don't have to set one foot outside. And..." He hadn't wanted to admit discussing this with anyone else, but he also didn't want to lie to him. "And I've got a friend who helped me make sure that you wouldn't run into anybody during the trip."
"That does not answer my question," Spock informed him, still stiff and unforgiving under Jim's hands.
He sighed and gave up on being vague. "Gaila's a computer genius, kind of like you but with fewer ethical boundaries about it. There aren't a whole lot of people traveling around the building at this time of night anyway, but she sent out a message about the security system being worked on tonight and everyone needing to keep an eye on their safety mechanisms for the next few hours."
Spock just stared at him. "The message from Tellu was fabricated?"
"In that Tellu didn't actually send it and there's really no problem at all with the security system? Yeah, it's fabricated."
"To what purpose?"
Jim attempted another winning smile. "To make sure everyone stays in their rooms and doesn't bother us when we leave your apartment."
The tension kept him rigid and nervous, his gaze darting nervously from Jim to his own front door and back again. "I do not know... I have not..."
"Spock." He shifted his hands until they were cradling Spock's face, forcing him to meet his eyes. "I know this is hard for you. I know how much you hate leaving your safe space. But the only other place I've ever asked you to go is my apartment, and you've been safe there, haven't you? I mean, you've had an episode or two in there, but you're still okay. There's no one there to judge you or make you feel worse about the situation. Right?"
Spock stared at him for a few seconds before nodding slightly, his hands resting over Jim's on his face.
"So all I'm asking is that you trust me. No one is going to see us leaving. No one is going to meet us on the way and expect you to smile or greet them or make small talk. It's just going to be you and me. And when we get to where we're going, I promise that it's going to be a safe place, too. No one else around. Just us."
Spock's breathing had hitched and stuttered throughout Jim's explanation, and he made a valiant effort to get it back under control. "We..." He cleared his throat and tried again. "We will not see anyone."
Jim heard the question under the statement. "We won't see anyone," he affirmed. "And if we get halfway there and you decide that it really is too much for you, we'll come back. And if we get all the way there and it's too much for you, we'll come back. All you have to do is tell me that it's too overwhelming, and I'll bring you back here and boil up some tea and let you kick my ass at chess." He pressed another kiss to his mouth, smiling when Spock made a weak attempt to kiss back. "See? Whatever you decide, you're going to be okay."
Spock closed his eyes and fisted his hands in Jim's shirt for a moment, fighting for his equilibrium. Jim stayed quiet, not wanting to inundate him with more reasoning about why he should go, why he should trust him. He brushed his hands through Spock's hair, giving into the temptation to just pet him for awhile, loving the way it curled around his fingers as he carded through it.
"All right," Spock whispered, eyes still shut and leaning into Jim's hands.
Jim broke into a wide grin. "Excellent," he murmured, kissing his forehead. "Just tell me when you're ready."
Spock stood there for another minute or two to gather up his courage, apparently relying on bravado alone to get him to wherever Jim planned to take him. "Ready." He was still shivering a bit when he nodded, allowing himself to be led out of his apartment and toward the stairs. "You said we would not leave the building," Spock pointed out, but followed Jim anyway.
"We won't," Jim assured him, one hand still on his wrist and leading him up.
Spock's gaze kept darting up past Jim on the stairs and then behind himself, apparently still paranoid that they would be caught by strangers. "You also stated we would not see anyone else."
"I did."
Now Spock was eying the doors of the other rooms as if someone would jump out at them at any moment. "Does that include your own friends and acquaintances?"
"Trust me, I wouldn't just spring my friends on you. That would be mean at best and downright cruel at worst if Gaila was involved. I promise I'll give you fair warning if I want you to meet any of them." He shot him a comforting smile over his shoulder. "Like I said, it's just you and me. I promise."
Spock nodded, still looking nervous and suspicious as they made their way to the top floor and then up the maintenance staircase beyond that. Jim led him up to a door at the top of the stairs and typed in the security code that would open it. "Still okay?" he murmured to Spock.
Spock gave one last anxious look over his shoulder, then turned to face Jim again. "Yes."
Jim opened the door and, for approximately three heartbeats in time, regretted it. When he'd come home after his classes he had left Gaila to her own devices long enough to hack into the building network and send out the fabricated security system notice. Apparently she'd also had enough time to come up here and add her own 'special touch' to the area, because where he'd been expecting the bare rooftop and endless sky, Gaila had left behind a pile of blankets and a couple of pillows. And knowing Spock's penchant for panic attacks if Jim tried anything physical...
But after those three heartbeats in time, he saw the logic of the situation. The blankets were ragged old things of a neutral color and fabric - nothing girly or seductive about them at all. The pillows were the same. And if they were going to be up here for any significant length of time, they would appreciate the creature comforts. Maybe Gaila knew what she was doing after all.
"Jim?" Spock asked, looking at him for an explanation. He had gone rigid next to him, his eyes closed off behind his glasses.
"Relax. This isn't some lame seduction attempt, really," he insisted, tugging gently on Spock's wrist to lead him over to the pile. "I have a very good reason for bringing you up here and it has nothing to do with pushing your physical boundaries."
Spock looked torn for a moment, giving a faint twitch when he looked at the cozy set-up, then looking up at the sky. The latter seemed to center him; his eyes went wide as he took in the surprisingly clear view of the stars, no clouds or fog obscuring their beauty for once. He said nothing as he followed Jim and settled next to him in the blankets, his gaze never breaking from the view as he folded his legs under him.
"Pretty amazing, huh?" Jim was looking not so much at the sky as he was Spock's open, awed expression, the stars reflecting in the lenses of his glasses.
"I do not remember the last time I saw..." Spock trailed off, removing his glasses and peering at one specific point in the sky. "That is-"
Jim smiled, looping an arm around his waist and following his gaze. There was a bright, faintly pink-hued star hanging near the Cygnus constellation. "40 Eridani A," he supplied. "Vulcan. I'm surprised you didn't know it could be seen from Earth right now."
"I have not kept track of interstellar maps ever since I became bound to my apartment." Jim was amazed at the lack of stuttering or self-consciousness as Spock uttered the words. Usually any allusion to his problem had him hesitating or unable to finish his sentences. "How did you know?"
He felt sheepish when he admitted, "Your mother told me."
Spock surprised him again by breaking into a fond smile. "I should have known," he said quietly, reaching out and setting a hand on Jim's leg, resting there possessively.
Jim leaned closer, pressing himself against Spock's side until he could feel his unnatural heat seeping into him. "How's that?"
"She had a high degree of interest in our relationship when she contacted me this morning."
"Ah."
It was like watching a whole new side of Spock, Jim realized. He wasn't getting anxious over the change of surroundings; if anything he was more relaxed than Jim had ever seen him, his eyes fixed on the stars and his body language open and receptive. His face was totally at ease, no worry lines aging his eyes or sharpening the lines of his mouth. Jim flashed back to the night he had herded him to bed when he was sick and watched him sleep for a few minutes, how he felt as if he had been seeing the real Spock underneath all his neuroses. It was as if that Spock had appeared again, totally at ease with himself. And by God, it was amazing to see. He'd fallen in love with shy, reclusive, easily ruffled Spock. And seeing the serene, open Spock awestruck at the sky's expanse... God, it was doing things to him.
"You're so different out here," he whispered, the words leaving his mouth before he could think to filter them.
And shockingly, Spock took no offense to the words, didn't even seize up for the barest instant. Instead he fixed that awestruck gaze on Jim. "How so?"
Jim shifted a bit until he was kneeling in front of him, fingers carding into his hair. "You're relaxed, totally and completely. I've never seen anything like it."
The curious look melted into something more affectionate. Spock took one of his hands in his own and began playing with the fingers. "I am... at ease here," he chose his words carefully rather than tripping over them as he usually did in an unfamiliar situation. "I have a rather illogical attachment to the stars."
He chuckled, turning his hand over and watching Spock trace unknown symbols into his palm. "It's not illogical. Some of us are just born with an affinity for it. That's how the Academy suckers us into the service."
He wasn't thinking when he said it, and the moment it was out he fully expected Spock to freeze up on him. They couldn't talk about the Academy - he had learned that the hard way. But Spock surprised him yet again. "Indeed," he murmured, giving Vulcan one last, probing look before focusing his attention solely on Jim.
And Jim, for all his fantasies of bringing shy, nervous Spock up here to look at the stars, for all his imaginings of being some kind of rock for him in his time of need, found himself literally squirming under the heat of Spock's gaze. He had seen his intensity before, seen it in how he threw himself into his work or meticulously took apart Jim's chess strategy. But he'd never had it focused directly on him, and it turned him from a charming, confident, supportive boyfriend into a blushing, babbling thirteen year old girl. Again. "Seriously, you should see yourself right now," his mouth started to run away with him. "I mean, you're all quiet and focused and relaxed, like seriously relaxed; I've never seen you-"
Spock shut him up with a kiss. Which was shocking enough on its own, since Jim tended to initiate most of the physical contact between them. But it wasn't just one of the shy, hasty kisses Spock stole when he was feeling bold and then immediately withdrew as if he'd done something wrong. Spock literally wrapped a hand around the back of his neck and pulled him into it, mouths slotted together for only a heartbeat before he broke the contact to breathe against Jim's lips. "You talk too much," he whispered, the words gusting over his face like smoke, warm and lazy.
"Y-yeah," Jim stuttered, completely taken aback by seeing this side of Spock. "But once in awhile it works out for me." And he proved his point by closing the infinitesimal space between them and slotting their mouths together again, swallowing up that delicious purring noise he'd heard Spock make on rare occasions.
Rather than trying to deepen it or open his mouth to let Jim take control of it, Spock broke from him again to pepper tender, fleeting kisses along the side of his face, pressed against his ear, lingering at his temple. Jim flailed, his confidence completely gone in the wake of a suddenly fearless, unapologetically affectionate Spock. All he could do was grab fistfuls of Spock's shirt and arch up against him, letting his head fall back and groaning softly when Spock took it as an invitation to drag his tongue over Jim's Adam's apple.
"S-spock," he tripped over the name, not realizing that he was being pushed back until his head hit one of the pillows. "Spock, do you-"
"Yes," Spock cut him off, apparently not needing to hear the question. His fingers made quick work of the buttons on Jim's shirt, pressing more of those searingly sweet kisses along his collarbone and down his chest. It was not an effort to discover Jim's sensitive spots, he realized through the haze that had taken over his brain; Spock had avoided Jim's nipples, hadn't exerted any more pressure on his skin past the dragging of his lips. He wasn't marking him, was barely touching his hot, sandpapery tongue to Jim's flesh. Instead it was as if he were exploring him, inhaling the scent of him, cataloging him for future reference. His hypothesis was confirmed when Spock nosed against his belly, fit his hands around Jim's hips and inhaled as if he'd been composed of pure oxygen.
Jim couldn't help the full-body shudder that coursed through him, reaching out and threading his fingers into Spock's wild, curly hair. "Spock," he tried again, not sure what he wanted to say past trying to make some kind of contribution to... well, whatever they were doing. He had never expected that pushing Spock's boundaries would have resulted in this, would never have dreamed that having him out under the stars could transform him so completely.
"Shh," Spock shushed him, and Jim gave up any hope of interrupting him. He let out another heartfelt groan when he felt Spock's hands at the fastenings of his jeans, heard the low growl of the zipper being undone, felt the cool night air ghosting over his bare skin as Spock tugged at his jeans and underwear enough to expose his cock.
He realized dimly through his haze that the air was all he could feel, all he had felt for the past several seconds. He also realized that he'd closed his eyes to concentrate on the sensations, forcing them open and staring down at Spock, momentarily terrified that being face to face with the evidence of Jim's arousal had thrown him from his temporary state of confidence and ease.
But there was no tension in Spock's expression when Jim looked down at him. His hands were relaxed around his hips, cradling the jut of his hipbones. And he looked... it was some mad combination of lust, affection, and scientific curiosity that had Jim breaking out in a goofy smile. "Spock?"
"Fascinating," Spock murmured, and that was the last thing Jim had expected, huffing out a breathless laugh. The breathless laugh turned into a faint choking sound when Spock closed a hand over him, stroking him from root to tip. "The skin here is almost as cool to the touch as the rest of your body."
"Oh," Jim's voice hitched, unable to stop his hips from jutting forward. "The diff... difference in body temperature."
"Indeed." And how he could sound so fucking scholarly about it while still pinning Jim with that hungry expression was dumbfounding. "You produce little natural lubrication," he continued his lecture, then tilted his head to the side and dragged his thumb over the slit, making a low rumbling noise when a small bead of precome appeared there. "Ah," he said, as if to himself, thumbing over the slit again and spreading the small bit of moisture around.
Jim, for his part, was dying a slow, wonderful death. It shouldn't have been such a turn on to feel like some sort of human specimen under Spock's hands, but apparently his cock had decided otherwise. "I, guh, yeah," he stuttered.
And then, with that lusty, curious expression still spread over his face, Spock leaned down and dragged his tongue over him from root to tip, suckling lightly at the head as if gauging the flavor there. Jim let out a sharp cry that should have been humiliating - he should not have been falling apart like some inexperienced whelp getting his first handjob. But hell if he could convince the rest of his body of that. A huge part of it was mental, he knew - the very idea of Spock exploring him like this when he was usually so reserved, so self-conscious, was exhilarating. Added to that was the visual of Spock's tongue dragging over his skin, Spock's eyes drinking him in as if he were some sort of grand puzzle he wanted to dismantle.
And before Jim could put too much more thought into that soft, adoring look on his face, Spock wrapped one hand around the base of his cock, fit his lips around the shaft, and sucked him down.
His hips bucked forward, automatically seeking more heat, more suction, more friction, just more, damn it, but Spock had left one hand cradling his hip and was pinning him down effortlessly. He wanted to thrust forward, couldn't control the urge no matter how much he tried, but it didn't matter: Spock was holding him down one-handed. And that easy demonstration of strength was almost as arousing as the maddeningly light suction around his cock, the exploring tongue licking over the thick vein along the underside.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck, Spock," Jim chanted, one hand fisting in his hair just to anchor himself to reality, the other reaching down and lacing his fingers with Spock's on his hip. Spock moaned around him as their fingers linked, the vibrations setting fire to his spine. He clenched Spock's hand in his reflexively, blunt nails digging into his skin, and Gaila must have been right about the sensitivity of Vulcan hands because Spock reacted to that with a guttural groan, eyes squeezed shut in ecstasy.
"More," Jim whined, digging his nails into Spock's hand purposely now, hips jutting upward before Spock slammed them back down again. "More, harder, please Spock, I'm so close, so fucking close..." And he was, between the visual of the tentative blowjob and the suckling, vibrating, scorching sensations of it, he was right on the edge. He had wanted Spock for so long, had wanted to see him open and uninhibited and focusing all that raw energy on Jim and Jim alone, and the fact that he finally had all of those things was fraying at his sense of control.
Spock took pity on him, hollowing his cheeks and increasing the sucking pressure, tongue fluttering over the shaft with its rough, alien texture, and Jim finally let himself go. He dropped his head back against the blankets, giving a low, guttural cry as his back arched and his hips bucked, coming in long spurts down Spock's throat as he swallowed him down.
He lay there for several minutes trying to catch his breath, chest heaving, eyes gazing blearily up at the stars as they blurred together and slowly came back into focus. "Shit, Spock," he wheezed, smiling down at where he'd pillowed his head against Jim's thigh. He brushed his fingers through the sweaty mass of dark hair, squeezing Spock's hand in his, opening his mouth to say something more-
When Spock moaned and squeezed right back, his hand tense and shaky in Jim's. A wicked grin spread over Jim's face, tugging lightly at the back of Spock's neck. "Up," he encouraged him, pulling at him until he was lying next to him again, the sweltering heat of him plastered against Jim's chest and thighs, a telltale bulge digging into his hip. He leaned forward to lick the taste of himself from Spock's mouth, indulging in a long, searing kiss. He could spend hours doing this, he realized, just learning the contours of Spock's mouth, trying to chase down that elusive flavor of his until he had it fully analyzed. But Spock needed more than that, if the slow rolling of his hips against Jim's was any indication.
He let go of Spock's fingers long enough to work at his pants, opening them just enough to slide a hand down the front of them. He couldn't actually see the anatomical differences between them this way - Spock was still fully clothed aside from having his pants undone - but he could feel what Spock was referring to when he'd made reference to the dry texture of Jim's skin. Male Vulcan anatomy was decidedly wetter, the lubrication and the heat working to make Jim feel as if he were being scorched as he wrapped a hand around what felt like a shaft similar to his own and started a steady stroking rhythm. Spock made a low keening sound in the back of his throat which abruptly changed to a whine when Jim laced the fingers of his free hand with Spock's, digging his nails into the back of his hand again.
"Jim..." Spock gasped, his expression wide and vulnerable as he pressed his forehead to Jim's. His eyes held no trace of the deep brown warmth he so loved, blown dark and unending as he lost himself in the sensations.
"God, you're amazing," Jim breathed, bringing Spock's hand to his mouth and pressing a kiss to the palm. "I didn't know you still had this in you, this fucking incredible, confident, gorgeous you so close to the surface." Spock gasped and screwed his eyes shut, hips jerking and stuttering as Jim continued stroking him, firming up his grip and increasing the tempo. "Look at me, Spock," he crooned at him, kissing his eyelids, between his arched eyebrows, the bridge of his nose. "Look at me, beautiful. Let me see you. Let me see you fall apart. I want you to, Spock. I'm right here." He was babbling again, unable to stop himself despite the temptation to simply lock lips with him and swallow down the breathless, involuntary noises he was making. "I'm right here, Spock. You're safe with me. I want to see you, Spock, please just let me, let me, let me," he repeated endlessly, the words becoming more and more breathless as he drove him closer and closer to the end, willing him to open his eyes as the rhythm of his hips became stilted, jarring. And just as Spock's mouth dropped open in a nearly soundless cry, just as Jim felt the hot spurts over his hand, Spock's eyes blew wide open, locked to Jim's own.
It was, without question, the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
He worked him through the last of his tremors, removing his hand when Spock gave a violent shudder as if he were too sensitive to be touched anymore. Jim wiped his hand on the blanket, silently promising to wash them before he returned them to their proper owner, then threw his arm over Spock's waist and pulled him closer. Spock was panting, shivering, pulling in air as if his lungs had just lost a half of their air capacity. He couldn't tell if that was an attempt to recover from his orgasm or the warning signs of an attack, nuzzling his face closer to Spock's and pressing sweet, fleeting kisses to his lips. "Hey," he whispered, quiet and intimate. "You okay?"
Spock didn't speak for a long time, one hand still clutching to Jim's own, the other fisted in his unbuttoned shirt. He finally shook his head from side to side, a nearly inaudible, "No," leaving his lips. And before Jim could ask why, could offer support or a solution or ask any questions, he continued. "But I believe... I believe I will be."
Jim's heart soared. "Yeah," he murmured, pulling him closer. "I think you will."
Chapter Twenty Two
Fandom: Star Trek XI
Pairing: Spock/Kirk, hints of others
Rating: NC-17
Notes: Written for the Star Trek XI Kink Meme prompt found here: "AU - Kirk has moved into a apartment/house and wants to get to know his neighbors. He meets his neighbor Spock, a loner who suffers from extreme agoraphobia. Kirk thinks he's beautiful enigma."
Chapter Notes: If this seems sudden and/or slightly out of character, have no fear - it will be addressed in the next chapter. In the meantime, enjoy. :)
Jim was glad McCoy wasn't around to see any of this, because he was getting mighty damn tired of the Princess Jamie comments. Something about Spock turned him into a nervous thirteen year old girl, and thank God McCoy wasn't around to witness it manifesting tonight. He'd be offering to paint Jim's nails, and Jim would be forced to punch him, and McCoy would probably retaliate with a hypospray, and it would probably make Jim's hands swell up and his eyeballs bleed, and oh my God, why was he thinking about this now?
"Are you going to throw up?" Gaila sassed him from her perch on Jim's sofa.
He made a face at her. "No."
"Because you look like you're going to throw up. That's not some human pre-sex thing, is it? Because if all the humans I've screwed around with have been throwing up before we-"
"No, I am not going to throw up, and there's no need to cast aspersions on the entire human race just because you think I look sick."
"Tch, humans are so touchy," she muttered, missing the point on purpose like she always did. "Are those your ass-hugging jeans? Turn around," she ordered, and he didn't think to disobey her. "Those are not your ass-hugging jeans. Go find the ones you were wearing when you moved in. Those looked great."
"They have holes and paint on them. That's not sexy."
"Depends where the holes are," she grinned at him. "Now go put them on. Your shirt's fine, leave that alone."
"Remind me how exactly you managed to weasel your way in here? Because I don't recall inviting you in and I sure as shit don't remember needing fashion tips from someone who wears pink dental floss to seduce women."
"Must've been memorable, seeing as that's the second time you've bitched about it. Now go change."
He debated arguing with her again, but the fact of the matter was she'd been incredibly helpful last time he had wanted to move things forward with Spock. It wouldn't hurt to listen to her again. Even so... "Am I gonna smell like your pheromones when I go over there? Because it's pointless to change if I'm gonna have to shower after you leave."
"I took a double dose of my inhibitors after lunch. He shouldn't be able to smell anything questionable on you. Unless I rub myself all over you before you head over there."
"I'll pass, thanks." He emerged from his bedroom in the 'right' pair of jeans, feeling even more like a thirteen year old girl than ever. "Does this meet inspection?"
She eyed him critically. "They're not as tight on you as I remembered."
"Gaila, I am not going to go through every pair of pants in my closet until you find one you like. Pick these or pick the other pair and then get out."
"Maybe you ought to take a shower after all. Sounds like you could use a good wank to get all the bitchiness out of your system. Being an irritant is not a turn-on, Jimmy. Unless you've got a Klingon on the side I don't know about." She glared at him suspiciously. "Is there a Klingon on the side?"
"Oh no. You've found me out. Aperokei and I are in love and you can't stop us," he deadpanned.
She threw one of the couch pillows at him. "You're adding to your bar tab every time you mock me, I'll have you know."
All of the fight went out of Jim suddenly and he sagged into his armchair. "Trust me, Gaila. If this works I will buy your drinks for the next month."
Her eyes lit up. "Really?"
"Your Cosmopolitans," he backtracked quickly. "When we're out at the Academy bars. Looks like it's time for you to go."
She snickered at him, hopping up from her seat and kissing him on the cheek. "Good luck, Jimmy."
"Thanks," he returned, watching her flounce out the door.
He waited until he heard the click of her own apartment door closing, not wanting to be watched when he finally knocked on Spock's door. He smiled when Spock's face came into view. "Hey."
"Jim," Spock returned, gesturing towards the kitchen. "We have not had an opportunity to play for 4.8 days. I believe it is your turn to play white."
Jim stopped him with a gentle hand on his wrist before he could take off towards the board. "I'll keep that in mind," he smiled in what he hoped was a winning fashion. "But I have another idea."
To his credit, Spock merely raised an eyebrow at him rather than seizing up automatically. Usually when Jim changed their routine, Spock would get anxious and stuttery on him. He must have had a good day if he was being so open to suggestion. Jim gave him a good long look and what he saw confirmed his hypothesis. The bags under Spock's eyes were gone. His glasses were clean and perched straight on his nose. His posture was perfect, but not rigid. It even looked as though he'd brushed his mass of dark hair; it still curled around his ears and along the nape of his neck, but it no longer made him look so wild. It was just long and silky, begging to be pet.
"Are you going to elucidate on this idea of yours?" Spock interrupted Jim's thoughts, eyebrow arching ever-higher over his glasses.
"Right, yeah," he shook his head to stop distracting himself. "There's something I'd like for you to see. But it would involve leaving your room."
That killed the relaxed vibe Spock had been giving off. His shoulders tensed. The expression on his face morphed from easy and open to the neutral mask Jim hated. "I see," Spock said, his voice strained.
Jim moved forward, sifting his fingers into Spock's hair soothingly. "Relax," he pleaded, kissing him softly. "It doesn't involve leaving the building, I promise. And you won't have to interact with anyone but me."
He didn't lean into the contact and didn't really return the kiss either. His gaze turned piercing. "How are you able to make that guarantee?"
"Because I've worked it out so you don't have to set one foot outside. And..." He hadn't wanted to admit discussing this with anyone else, but he also didn't want to lie to him. "And I've got a friend who helped me make sure that you wouldn't run into anybody during the trip."
"That does not answer my question," Spock informed him, still stiff and unforgiving under Jim's hands.
He sighed and gave up on being vague. "Gaila's a computer genius, kind of like you but with fewer ethical boundaries about it. There aren't a whole lot of people traveling around the building at this time of night anyway, but she sent out a message about the security system being worked on tonight and everyone needing to keep an eye on their safety mechanisms for the next few hours."
Spock just stared at him. "The message from Tellu was fabricated?"
"In that Tellu didn't actually send it and there's really no problem at all with the security system? Yeah, it's fabricated."
"To what purpose?"
Jim attempted another winning smile. "To make sure everyone stays in their rooms and doesn't bother us when we leave your apartment."
The tension kept him rigid and nervous, his gaze darting nervously from Jim to his own front door and back again. "I do not know... I have not..."
"Spock." He shifted his hands until they were cradling Spock's face, forcing him to meet his eyes. "I know this is hard for you. I know how much you hate leaving your safe space. But the only other place I've ever asked you to go is my apartment, and you've been safe there, haven't you? I mean, you've had an episode or two in there, but you're still okay. There's no one there to judge you or make you feel worse about the situation. Right?"
Spock stared at him for a few seconds before nodding slightly, his hands resting over Jim's on his face.
"So all I'm asking is that you trust me. No one is going to see us leaving. No one is going to meet us on the way and expect you to smile or greet them or make small talk. It's just going to be you and me. And when we get to where we're going, I promise that it's going to be a safe place, too. No one else around. Just us."
Spock's breathing had hitched and stuttered throughout Jim's explanation, and he made a valiant effort to get it back under control. "We..." He cleared his throat and tried again. "We will not see anyone."
Jim heard the question under the statement. "We won't see anyone," he affirmed. "And if we get halfway there and you decide that it really is too much for you, we'll come back. And if we get all the way there and it's too much for you, we'll come back. All you have to do is tell me that it's too overwhelming, and I'll bring you back here and boil up some tea and let you kick my ass at chess." He pressed another kiss to his mouth, smiling when Spock made a weak attempt to kiss back. "See? Whatever you decide, you're going to be okay."
Spock closed his eyes and fisted his hands in Jim's shirt for a moment, fighting for his equilibrium. Jim stayed quiet, not wanting to inundate him with more reasoning about why he should go, why he should trust him. He brushed his hands through Spock's hair, giving into the temptation to just pet him for awhile, loving the way it curled around his fingers as he carded through it.
"All right," Spock whispered, eyes still shut and leaning into Jim's hands.
Jim broke into a wide grin. "Excellent," he murmured, kissing his forehead. "Just tell me when you're ready."
Spock stood there for another minute or two to gather up his courage, apparently relying on bravado alone to get him to wherever Jim planned to take him. "Ready." He was still shivering a bit when he nodded, allowing himself to be led out of his apartment and toward the stairs. "You said we would not leave the building," Spock pointed out, but followed Jim anyway.
"We won't," Jim assured him, one hand still on his wrist and leading him up.
Spock's gaze kept darting up past Jim on the stairs and then behind himself, apparently still paranoid that they would be caught by strangers. "You also stated we would not see anyone else."
"I did."
Now Spock was eying the doors of the other rooms as if someone would jump out at them at any moment. "Does that include your own friends and acquaintances?"
"Trust me, I wouldn't just spring my friends on you. That would be mean at best and downright cruel at worst if Gaila was involved. I promise I'll give you fair warning if I want you to meet any of them." He shot him a comforting smile over his shoulder. "Like I said, it's just you and me. I promise."
Spock nodded, still looking nervous and suspicious as they made their way to the top floor and then up the maintenance staircase beyond that. Jim led him up to a door at the top of the stairs and typed in the security code that would open it. "Still okay?" he murmured to Spock.
Spock gave one last anxious look over his shoulder, then turned to face Jim again. "Yes."
Jim opened the door and, for approximately three heartbeats in time, regretted it. When he'd come home after his classes he had left Gaila to her own devices long enough to hack into the building network and send out the fabricated security system notice. Apparently she'd also had enough time to come up here and add her own 'special touch' to the area, because where he'd been expecting the bare rooftop and endless sky, Gaila had left behind a pile of blankets and a couple of pillows. And knowing Spock's penchant for panic attacks if Jim tried anything physical...
But after those three heartbeats in time, he saw the logic of the situation. The blankets were ragged old things of a neutral color and fabric - nothing girly or seductive about them at all. The pillows were the same. And if they were going to be up here for any significant length of time, they would appreciate the creature comforts. Maybe Gaila knew what she was doing after all.
"Jim?" Spock asked, looking at him for an explanation. He had gone rigid next to him, his eyes closed off behind his glasses.
"Relax. This isn't some lame seduction attempt, really," he insisted, tugging gently on Spock's wrist to lead him over to the pile. "I have a very good reason for bringing you up here and it has nothing to do with pushing your physical boundaries."
Spock looked torn for a moment, giving a faint twitch when he looked at the cozy set-up, then looking up at the sky. The latter seemed to center him; his eyes went wide as he took in the surprisingly clear view of the stars, no clouds or fog obscuring their beauty for once. He said nothing as he followed Jim and settled next to him in the blankets, his gaze never breaking from the view as he folded his legs under him.
"Pretty amazing, huh?" Jim was looking not so much at the sky as he was Spock's open, awed expression, the stars reflecting in the lenses of his glasses.
"I do not remember the last time I saw..." Spock trailed off, removing his glasses and peering at one specific point in the sky. "That is-"
Jim smiled, looping an arm around his waist and following his gaze. There was a bright, faintly pink-hued star hanging near the Cygnus constellation. "40 Eridani A," he supplied. "Vulcan. I'm surprised you didn't know it could be seen from Earth right now."
"I have not kept track of interstellar maps ever since I became bound to my apartment." Jim was amazed at the lack of stuttering or self-consciousness as Spock uttered the words. Usually any allusion to his problem had him hesitating or unable to finish his sentences. "How did you know?"
He felt sheepish when he admitted, "Your mother told me."
Spock surprised him again by breaking into a fond smile. "I should have known," he said quietly, reaching out and setting a hand on Jim's leg, resting there possessively.
Jim leaned closer, pressing himself against Spock's side until he could feel his unnatural heat seeping into him. "How's that?"
"She had a high degree of interest in our relationship when she contacted me this morning."
"Ah."
It was like watching a whole new side of Spock, Jim realized. He wasn't getting anxious over the change of surroundings; if anything he was more relaxed than Jim had ever seen him, his eyes fixed on the stars and his body language open and receptive. His face was totally at ease, no worry lines aging his eyes or sharpening the lines of his mouth. Jim flashed back to the night he had herded him to bed when he was sick and watched him sleep for a few minutes, how he felt as if he had been seeing the real Spock underneath all his neuroses. It was as if that Spock had appeared again, totally at ease with himself. And by God, it was amazing to see. He'd fallen in love with shy, reclusive, easily ruffled Spock. And seeing the serene, open Spock awestruck at the sky's expanse... God, it was doing things to him.
"You're so different out here," he whispered, the words leaving his mouth before he could think to filter them.
And shockingly, Spock took no offense to the words, didn't even seize up for the barest instant. Instead he fixed that awestruck gaze on Jim. "How so?"
Jim shifted a bit until he was kneeling in front of him, fingers carding into his hair. "You're relaxed, totally and completely. I've never seen anything like it."
The curious look melted into something more affectionate. Spock took one of his hands in his own and began playing with the fingers. "I am... at ease here," he chose his words carefully rather than tripping over them as he usually did in an unfamiliar situation. "I have a rather illogical attachment to the stars."
He chuckled, turning his hand over and watching Spock trace unknown symbols into his palm. "It's not illogical. Some of us are just born with an affinity for it. That's how the Academy suckers us into the service."
He wasn't thinking when he said it, and the moment it was out he fully expected Spock to freeze up on him. They couldn't talk about the Academy - he had learned that the hard way. But Spock surprised him yet again. "Indeed," he murmured, giving Vulcan one last, probing look before focusing his attention solely on Jim.
And Jim, for all his fantasies of bringing shy, nervous Spock up here to look at the stars, for all his imaginings of being some kind of rock for him in his time of need, found himself literally squirming under the heat of Spock's gaze. He had seen his intensity before, seen it in how he threw himself into his work or meticulously took apart Jim's chess strategy. But he'd never had it focused directly on him, and it turned him from a charming, confident, supportive boyfriend into a blushing, babbling thirteen year old girl. Again. "Seriously, you should see yourself right now," his mouth started to run away with him. "I mean, you're all quiet and focused and relaxed, like seriously relaxed; I've never seen you-"
Spock shut him up with a kiss. Which was shocking enough on its own, since Jim tended to initiate most of the physical contact between them. But it wasn't just one of the shy, hasty kisses Spock stole when he was feeling bold and then immediately withdrew as if he'd done something wrong. Spock literally wrapped a hand around the back of his neck and pulled him into it, mouths slotted together for only a heartbeat before he broke the contact to breathe against Jim's lips. "You talk too much," he whispered, the words gusting over his face like smoke, warm and lazy.
"Y-yeah," Jim stuttered, completely taken aback by seeing this side of Spock. "But once in awhile it works out for me." And he proved his point by closing the infinitesimal space between them and slotting their mouths together again, swallowing up that delicious purring noise he'd heard Spock make on rare occasions.
Rather than trying to deepen it or open his mouth to let Jim take control of it, Spock broke from him again to pepper tender, fleeting kisses along the side of his face, pressed against his ear, lingering at his temple. Jim flailed, his confidence completely gone in the wake of a suddenly fearless, unapologetically affectionate Spock. All he could do was grab fistfuls of Spock's shirt and arch up against him, letting his head fall back and groaning softly when Spock took it as an invitation to drag his tongue over Jim's Adam's apple.
"S-spock," he tripped over the name, not realizing that he was being pushed back until his head hit one of the pillows. "Spock, do you-"
"Yes," Spock cut him off, apparently not needing to hear the question. His fingers made quick work of the buttons on Jim's shirt, pressing more of those searingly sweet kisses along his collarbone and down his chest. It was not an effort to discover Jim's sensitive spots, he realized through the haze that had taken over his brain; Spock had avoided Jim's nipples, hadn't exerted any more pressure on his skin past the dragging of his lips. He wasn't marking him, was barely touching his hot, sandpapery tongue to Jim's flesh. Instead it was as if he were exploring him, inhaling the scent of him, cataloging him for future reference. His hypothesis was confirmed when Spock nosed against his belly, fit his hands around Jim's hips and inhaled as if he'd been composed of pure oxygen.
Jim couldn't help the full-body shudder that coursed through him, reaching out and threading his fingers into Spock's wild, curly hair. "Spock," he tried again, not sure what he wanted to say past trying to make some kind of contribution to... well, whatever they were doing. He had never expected that pushing Spock's boundaries would have resulted in this, would never have dreamed that having him out under the stars could transform him so completely.
"Shh," Spock shushed him, and Jim gave up any hope of interrupting him. He let out another heartfelt groan when he felt Spock's hands at the fastenings of his jeans, heard the low growl of the zipper being undone, felt the cool night air ghosting over his bare skin as Spock tugged at his jeans and underwear enough to expose his cock.
He realized dimly through his haze that the air was all he could feel, all he had felt for the past several seconds. He also realized that he'd closed his eyes to concentrate on the sensations, forcing them open and staring down at Spock, momentarily terrified that being face to face with the evidence of Jim's arousal had thrown him from his temporary state of confidence and ease.
But there was no tension in Spock's expression when Jim looked down at him. His hands were relaxed around his hips, cradling the jut of his hipbones. And he looked... it was some mad combination of lust, affection, and scientific curiosity that had Jim breaking out in a goofy smile. "Spock?"
"Fascinating," Spock murmured, and that was the last thing Jim had expected, huffing out a breathless laugh. The breathless laugh turned into a faint choking sound when Spock closed a hand over him, stroking him from root to tip. "The skin here is almost as cool to the touch as the rest of your body."
"Oh," Jim's voice hitched, unable to stop his hips from jutting forward. "The diff... difference in body temperature."
"Indeed." And how he could sound so fucking scholarly about it while still pinning Jim with that hungry expression was dumbfounding. "You produce little natural lubrication," he continued his lecture, then tilted his head to the side and dragged his thumb over the slit, making a low rumbling noise when a small bead of precome appeared there. "Ah," he said, as if to himself, thumbing over the slit again and spreading the small bit of moisture around.
Jim, for his part, was dying a slow, wonderful death. It shouldn't have been such a turn on to feel like some sort of human specimen under Spock's hands, but apparently his cock had decided otherwise. "I, guh, yeah," he stuttered.
And then, with that lusty, curious expression still spread over his face, Spock leaned down and dragged his tongue over him from root to tip, suckling lightly at the head as if gauging the flavor there. Jim let out a sharp cry that should have been humiliating - he should not have been falling apart like some inexperienced whelp getting his first handjob. But hell if he could convince the rest of his body of that. A huge part of it was mental, he knew - the very idea of Spock exploring him like this when he was usually so reserved, so self-conscious, was exhilarating. Added to that was the visual of Spock's tongue dragging over his skin, Spock's eyes drinking him in as if he were some sort of grand puzzle he wanted to dismantle.
And before Jim could put too much more thought into that soft, adoring look on his face, Spock wrapped one hand around the base of his cock, fit his lips around the shaft, and sucked him down.
His hips bucked forward, automatically seeking more heat, more suction, more friction, just more, damn it, but Spock had left one hand cradling his hip and was pinning him down effortlessly. He wanted to thrust forward, couldn't control the urge no matter how much he tried, but it didn't matter: Spock was holding him down one-handed. And that easy demonstration of strength was almost as arousing as the maddeningly light suction around his cock, the exploring tongue licking over the thick vein along the underside.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck, Spock," Jim chanted, one hand fisting in his hair just to anchor himself to reality, the other reaching down and lacing his fingers with Spock's on his hip. Spock moaned around him as their fingers linked, the vibrations setting fire to his spine. He clenched Spock's hand in his reflexively, blunt nails digging into his skin, and Gaila must have been right about the sensitivity of Vulcan hands because Spock reacted to that with a guttural groan, eyes squeezed shut in ecstasy.
"More," Jim whined, digging his nails into Spock's hand purposely now, hips jutting upward before Spock slammed them back down again. "More, harder, please Spock, I'm so close, so fucking close..." And he was, between the visual of the tentative blowjob and the suckling, vibrating, scorching sensations of it, he was right on the edge. He had wanted Spock for so long, had wanted to see him open and uninhibited and focusing all that raw energy on Jim and Jim alone, and the fact that he finally had all of those things was fraying at his sense of control.
Spock took pity on him, hollowing his cheeks and increasing the sucking pressure, tongue fluttering over the shaft with its rough, alien texture, and Jim finally let himself go. He dropped his head back against the blankets, giving a low, guttural cry as his back arched and his hips bucked, coming in long spurts down Spock's throat as he swallowed him down.
He lay there for several minutes trying to catch his breath, chest heaving, eyes gazing blearily up at the stars as they blurred together and slowly came back into focus. "Shit, Spock," he wheezed, smiling down at where he'd pillowed his head against Jim's thigh. He brushed his fingers through the sweaty mass of dark hair, squeezing Spock's hand in his, opening his mouth to say something more-
When Spock moaned and squeezed right back, his hand tense and shaky in Jim's. A wicked grin spread over Jim's face, tugging lightly at the back of Spock's neck. "Up," he encouraged him, pulling at him until he was lying next to him again, the sweltering heat of him plastered against Jim's chest and thighs, a telltale bulge digging into his hip. He leaned forward to lick the taste of himself from Spock's mouth, indulging in a long, searing kiss. He could spend hours doing this, he realized, just learning the contours of Spock's mouth, trying to chase down that elusive flavor of his until he had it fully analyzed. But Spock needed more than that, if the slow rolling of his hips against Jim's was any indication.
He let go of Spock's fingers long enough to work at his pants, opening them just enough to slide a hand down the front of them. He couldn't actually see the anatomical differences between them this way - Spock was still fully clothed aside from having his pants undone - but he could feel what Spock was referring to when he'd made reference to the dry texture of Jim's skin. Male Vulcan anatomy was decidedly wetter, the lubrication and the heat working to make Jim feel as if he were being scorched as he wrapped a hand around what felt like a shaft similar to his own and started a steady stroking rhythm. Spock made a low keening sound in the back of his throat which abruptly changed to a whine when Jim laced the fingers of his free hand with Spock's, digging his nails into the back of his hand again.
"Jim..." Spock gasped, his expression wide and vulnerable as he pressed his forehead to Jim's. His eyes held no trace of the deep brown warmth he so loved, blown dark and unending as he lost himself in the sensations.
"God, you're amazing," Jim breathed, bringing Spock's hand to his mouth and pressing a kiss to the palm. "I didn't know you still had this in you, this fucking incredible, confident, gorgeous you so close to the surface." Spock gasped and screwed his eyes shut, hips jerking and stuttering as Jim continued stroking him, firming up his grip and increasing the tempo. "Look at me, Spock," he crooned at him, kissing his eyelids, between his arched eyebrows, the bridge of his nose. "Look at me, beautiful. Let me see you. Let me see you fall apart. I want you to, Spock. I'm right here." He was babbling again, unable to stop himself despite the temptation to simply lock lips with him and swallow down the breathless, involuntary noises he was making. "I'm right here, Spock. You're safe with me. I want to see you, Spock, please just let me, let me, let me," he repeated endlessly, the words becoming more and more breathless as he drove him closer and closer to the end, willing him to open his eyes as the rhythm of his hips became stilted, jarring. And just as Spock's mouth dropped open in a nearly soundless cry, just as Jim felt the hot spurts over his hand, Spock's eyes blew wide open, locked to Jim's own.
It was, without question, the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
He worked him through the last of his tremors, removing his hand when Spock gave a violent shudder as if he were too sensitive to be touched anymore. Jim wiped his hand on the blanket, silently promising to wash them before he returned them to their proper owner, then threw his arm over Spock's waist and pulled him closer. Spock was panting, shivering, pulling in air as if his lungs had just lost a half of their air capacity. He couldn't tell if that was an attempt to recover from his orgasm or the warning signs of an attack, nuzzling his face closer to Spock's and pressing sweet, fleeting kisses to his lips. "Hey," he whispered, quiet and intimate. "You okay?"
Spock didn't speak for a long time, one hand still clutching to Jim's own, the other fisted in his unbuttoned shirt. He finally shook his head from side to side, a nearly inaudible, "No," leaving his lips. And before Jim could ask why, could offer support or a solution or ask any questions, he continued. "But I believe... I believe I will be."
Jim's heart soared. "Yeah," he murmured, pulling him closer. "I think you will."
Chapter Twenty Two
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 07:03 am (UTC)LOOK AT HOW FAR THEY HAVE COME. Look at where they are! Whilst I'm interested to find out what prompted Spock's change of heart, part of me almost doesn't care because this is EVERYTHING I COULD HAVE IMAGINED AND MORE. It was so PERFECT with Vulcan in the sky and the soft touches and how Jim just doesn't want anything more even though he's burning with it and then SPOCK taking the initiative and moving things along and the perfect, perfect way it happened.
JKAJD:KJAJKLJLJDLKJKL:JD ♥ best chapter ever ;_;
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 07:06 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2010-04-13 07:12 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 07:25 am (UTC)Things I hope to see in the future: 1) Jim having an allergic reaction + Spock freaking out, 2) Bones meeting Spock with Joanna in tow, 3) Jim running into Stonn and tearing him a new one.
If none of these make it into the story I won't be too broken hearted, but in my mind they're gonna happen. ^_^ Thanks again!
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 07:25 am (UTC)It is amazing how each time I'd wait for an updated, it'd feel like forever and a day even when it only took you less than 24 hours to update! Yet, the reading of each part didn't feel long or arduous. It's just been feeling natural and wonderful and OMG I'M SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW, I DON'T EVEN....
Anyway, I can't wait to see what you have in store for the next chapter. Seriously, you are hands down my favorite fanfic writer. I don't think you have it in you to write anything bad. I don't even follow most WIPs but LOOK AT ME RIGHT NOW! I'd follow the hell out of this if it went on for a hundred more chapters.
HOLY DAMN IT CHRISTMAS!
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 07:27 am (UTC)CHALK IT UP TO EXTREME FANGIRLING.
(no subject)
From:XWAOdiAWzAktpubh
From: (Anonymous) - Date: 2012-03-07 05:48 am (UTC) - Expand(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 07:49 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 09:06 am (UTC)I loved this chapter. I loved Spock's reaction when he first saw the stars, I love that Jim admitted that he'd spoken to Amanda instead of hiding things from Spock. And yeah, I loved that they finally got some action and that it was Spock who took the lead. I kept expecting Spock to start freaking out or for someone to inadvertently interrupt them - and I'm so glad that neither happened.
I love this fic, so so much. ♥ ♥ ♥
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 10:47 am (UTC)I am so glad these two finally got to this point without any interruptions! YAY FOR JIM AND SPOCK.
This has been a most rewarding ride. Thank you for sharing!
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 11:38 am (UTC)awesome story! keep it up :)
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 11:39 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 12:40 pm (UTC)\(^o^)/
♥
~chironstar@lj
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 12:58 pm (UTC)I'm with Jim on this one, seeing Spock so relaxed and so different is AMAZING. I love it when the boys get awesstruck over the stars, but being in this fic it's even more incredible.
Also: Yay sex! So sexy! The nails digging into Spock's hands, Spock's inquisitive scientist voice and Jim being held down with one hand were particularly hot. Jim officially owes Gaila a LOT of alcohol *lol*
Also when you think about it, Gaila and Spock's mom totally just conspired to get Spock and Jim laid. AWSM.
♥
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-14 05:16 am (UTC)(no subject)
From:(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 01:07 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 01:16 pm (UTC)cheers, cen
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 02:01 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 02:44 pm (UTC)XD
Also, I didn't think it was OOC, but I'm curious like a cat for an explanation. ;)
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 03:59 pm (UTC)I didn't notice the rating so I was surprised and then excited and then happy! It was perfect. I can't wait to see what prompted Spock's change. I'm so excited about where they go next with their relationship and Spock's recovery. There's something so great about Vulcan being in the sky at the same time.
Also, how convenient for Jim that Vulcans are self-lubricating *wink, wink*
-notchka88
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 04:37 pm (UTC)*flails*
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 05:37 pm (UTC)-Amy
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 07:10 pm (UTC)The best part about all this (but every fucking part was the best part, really) is that Spock's regaining his confidence - enough to INITIATE sex with Jim! Truly amazing, he's really come so far.
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 07:16 pm (UTC)but now I'm super paranoid that it's going to be a two steps forward, 2348 steps back kind of a thing. Has the meditation helped with some of this newfound confidence?(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-14 05:09 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 07:47 pm (UTC)That's really all there is to say! I heart this story so much. :)
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 07:48 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 08:14 pm (UTC)I'll be in my bunk.
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 09:16 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 10:07 pm (UTC)This chapter is pretty amazing. *fans self* It was not OOC the way I thought it might be, in the best way.
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-13 11:01 pm (UTC)And I read this chapter.
HOLY PINTO ON A STICK. HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO GO BACK TO LEARNING COGNITIVE LINGUISTICS AFTER READING THIS???